Takes place any time during First Contact where Daniel and Rodney are in the
Written for the Stargate Drabble List Challenge – Take two characters and write a scene involving one or more emotion. I’ve chosen Jealousy and contempt. This is all just a bit of fun.
Kid Jackson V Slugger McKay
This was getting old. Daniel took off his glasses, and snatching the hem of his shirt, polished the already clean lens carefully. The petty bickering with Rodney McKay had reached an all time high, and what little patience he had with the man was dangerously close to expiring. Even the secret lab they'd discovered hadn't been enough to curb Rodney's maniacal jealous streak. The physicist's fondness for intellectual superiority grated on Daniel nerves, and he found himself drifting down to the same level of childish behavior. Oh well, Daniel thought, can't beat him, so why not join him.
"So, McKay." Daniel flicked a speck of dust from his now overly clean glasses, and with a cool look, said in a deceptively conversational tone, "I think I read somewhere you almost ascended. How did that turn out for you?"
Rodney wasn't fooled. He straightened up from the Ancient consol he was tormenting and shot Daniel a sideward glance. Narrowing his eyes and returning the cool look, he straightened his shoulders. The game was on. Time to cut bait and fish.
"Well, I'm still here so… no, not very well. Thanks for asking." Tapping viciously at the glass of a broken dial, Rodney snapped his jaws tightly, like an alligator after its prey.
"Almost, but not quite? I'm sure humanity is thrilled." Daniel struggled to keep his face blank and his voice even. Rodney, to Daniels immense pleasure, was failing in that area.
"Something like that, and trust me, humanity should be." He was never one to back down from an intellectual fight. Dr. McKay thrived on the sparring. Unfortunately, so did Dr. Jackson. Atlantis wasn't big enough for them both.
Turning to lean his butt against the consol, arms crossed, Rodney studied the smiling archaeologist, and demanded suspiciously, "Why the sudden interest, Jackson? It's not like you haven't been there and done that."
"And got the T-shirt." Daniel deliberately mumbled, keeping his hand close to his mouth.
"What? What was that, Jackson? Can't hear you? Speak up!" Man's an idiot. Shouldn't have had such close proximity to O'Neill.
"You know they give you a free T-Shirt when you ascend?" With a twinkle in his eye, Daniel turned back to the over-head monitor and its scrolling Ancient script. Tapping the screen, he waited for the metaphorical ball to lob back over the net. Your shot, I believe.
Rodney snorted, "Oh! They so do not!" Do they? What are you saying McKay, of course they don'!. Take that!
"Er, okay then. How exactly would you know? Say what you will, but those Ascended sure know a pain in the ass when they see one." Straight up, I see one.
Rodney jumped in the air, his eye tic more pronounced as he opened his mouth and slammed it shut. A cunning look crossed his face and stilling his eye, he purred, "Right, say's you who got kicked off the ascendency plane for bad behaviour." An even slyer smile stayed plastered on his face.
"Oh, low blow." Daniel feigned hurt with his hands held over his heart. This was the Rodney McKay he knew and barely put up with. The game of verbal ping pong was far more entertaining than he'd first thought, and Daniel was enjoying himself finally. "It was more for interfering than bad behaviour." Touchy...touchy
"And the difference is what, exactly?" Moron!
"Not much obviously. Still, it was an experience." Daniel looked at his fingernails with an irritating nonchalance, and huffing, cleaned them on his other hand. "One everyone should have." Rodney as an ascended being? He'd analyse them out of existence!
"Oh, puh-leeze!" His eye tic now bouncing out of control, Rodney shook his head. Watching as Daniel deliberately polished his nails; he coughed, and remarked sarcastically, "I thought you said you didn't remember? Forgot about that bit again, Doctor Jackson? I have fish oil you can take, helps with long term memory loss and onset of astral dementia I believe."
Silence hung in the air as both men digested the latest snippy and bad tempered comment.
"Oh, thanks, but my memory is fine. You probably need to keep them, Rodney. I didn't remember much the first time, granted, but the second time? No problems. Clear as a bell."
"Then I suppose you remember lobbing back to Earth totally naked as well. Your idea or was that the Ancient's idea of a cosmic joke at your expense?"
"You know," Daniel tapped a finger against his lips and swept his gaze over Rodney's body, "I guess we should be grateful you didn't ascend. Descension might have been a bit of a push in your current physical shape."
Rodney snapped his mouth open and closed like a floundering fish, "I'm in the best shape I've been in, in years." He said pointing the fingers of both hands at himself, "Not an ounce of fat on me anywhere."
"Are you sure about that," Daniel stared at Rodney's stomach, "Looks like the food here agrees with you. Besides, there were no objects when I descended last time." He preened, smiling slyly before adding, "Sam didn't know quite were to look."
"Right, good for you. Really, I am sooo pleased." Rodney huffed and drummed his fingers on the console with a rat-a-tat-tat, "and we're having this conversation… why?"
"Oh, I don't know, just thought I'd pique your scientific curiosity."
"My scientific… and you are a doctor of what? Rocks?" Insufferable jackass!
Go, Rodney! Hook, line, and sinker. "Yep," Daniel smacked his lips, "No matter how ancient. Oops, did I mention ancient again? How tactless of me." With a shrug of his shoulders, Daniel grinned, "I'll be sure to forget I said that."